Woman On Top – How to Work Out the Relationship If You’re Earning More than Your Would-be Husband?

March 13, 2010 by  
Filed under General, Married Life

Congratulations! He finally uttered the big question. You are probably frantically surfing and scouring all corners of the Internet on resources and suppliers for your upcoming wedding. While this is all fine and dandy, have you ever stopped to think the possible issues you have to deal with as a married couple? Money, as distasteful as it may sound, is and always will be a big issue in a relationship, married or not. This is especially true if you are earning more than your husband-to-be. So what’s the relationship advice for women dealing with the same problem?
According to statistics, 20 years ago, approximately 17.8% women have out-earned their partners. By 2007, 25.9% of the female population enjoys higher salaries than their husbands – a fact that most men are struggling to come to terms with. Over the years, women have gained better jobs and better pay than men. While there are no hard and fast rules on dealing with this change, it is something that needs to be discussed between couples about to get married.
Jean Chatzky, a financial editor for TodayShow offers a practical take on this modern-day dilemma and provides relationship advice for women dealing with the same situation. According to Chatzky, even up to this day and age, people tend to cling to the traditional roles of a man and a woman in a relationship. Both are far happier in marriages if the husbands earn better salary and wife stays home to tend to the children and manage the household. Unfortunately, this is no longer the case and most women who start to earn more than their partners tend to feel guilty and go out of her way to compensate for the situation. According to Chatzky, it is quite rare to find married couples openly admitting that the wife is the breadwinner of the family.
So, is there any compromise to this? Chatzky encourages couple to really take time to talk and listen to one another. According to a study conducted by the University of Virginia, putting the issue of paychecks aside, becoming an emotionally engaged couple is a significant factor to maintaining a happy relationship. Additionally, it would not hurt for women to go out of their way and become the biggest cheerleaders for their husband. This means making an extra effort on understanding what he loves about his job, despite the fact that he may not be earning much and how you admire his contribution to your marriage, not just the monetary aspect. Another great relationship advice for women given by Chatzky is to firmly and completely believe that what your partner is offering and bringing into your relationship, is as equally valuable as yours. Otherwise, marriage may be doomed from the start.

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